Life story part two

Draft

Life story (part two)

This is my life story, especially as it pertains to my health, part two

Europe trip

David re-enters the chat/call after fetching/having a cup of tea.

Sally: You’re back!

David: Yes, we were going to talk about my trip, weren’t we?

Sally: Yes, the Europe trip. Where you got sick?

David: Okay first of all, it was both America and Europe. So instead, let us just call it, “I went on a long trip overseas shortly after finishing high school. I got sick while I was overseas and I was never well again.”

That is our next topic of conversation. Let’s talk about it.

Sally: Okay, let us get started. When was it?

David: I was overseas for about seven weeks. I spent one week in America and six weeks in Europe. When I left New Zealand it was 2006 and when I got back it was 2007, so I spent Christmas overseas. I visited California, France, Germany, Austria, Italy and Spain. Matthew and I went on the trip together.

I will now explain why and how I ended up getting tickets to travel to both the USA and Europe. I will also talk a little bit more about the itinerary. And then I will get to the details of when and how became so sick, and how the various people in my life responded to it. I will also tell you about the trip in general.

Here goes. It’s a fairly long story.

First of all, how did Matthew and I end up with tickets to go overseas to Europe and America? The answer to that is that my mother’s partner’s (Arnold) work paid for the tickets. He was working for an electrical engineering company in France at the time. The company used to pay for tickets every year to help them stay in touch with family. Sometimes my mother and Arnold used the tickets to fly to New Zealand to visit family, sometimes they used the tickets to fly other people in to visit them in Europe. This was so that they could maintain their relationships with and connections to family back in New Zealand. It was a part of the compensation package and one of Mum and Arnold’s conditions of his taking the job.

So anyway, I finished with my exams, and a few days later I hopped on a plane to go to California. My brother Matthew was with me. We flew from Wellington-Auckland-LAX-San Francisco. Our Aunty Wendy and her husband Uncle Chris were there to pick us up, and drove us to their two bedroom apartment in Los Altos (Los Altos is a Silicon Valley “bedroom community” sandwiched just between Palo Alto, Cupertino and Sunnyvale. It is very close to Stanford University and it is also the birthplace of the Apple 1 computer). They lived there with their two sons Andrew and Ben (my cousins).

I arrived at my Aunty Wendy’s apartment in Los Altos, California. This was after a fairly long journey in which I had three separate flights, a long lay over, and a bit of driving to get to-and-from the airport at each end. When I arrived at my Aunty’s apartment, I was thoroughly exhausted. But all the same, it was nice to see everyone again. I really liked my Aunty Wendy and my cousins Andrew and Ben. They were important to me! I also liked my Uncle Chris, although we weren’t enormously close (this was probably because he wasn’t a Christian, but I digress).

Sally: So how was your visit to see your family in California? What did you do while you were there? Also, you tell me more about your Aunty Wendy, Uncle Chris and your cousins Andrew and Ben?

David: Yes, I would be happy to tell you about my visit to California and what I did there. And of course I can tell you more about my extended family, but I might do that a little bit later on (in the notes section). 

David: We had already done the tourist thing in California before, so we were just there to spend time with family. And so, what did we do? We just spent time with them. Hanging out. Doing nothing much. We played video games, watched movies, went to get food at restaurants once or twice, we visited the San Francisco waterfront once. We ran errands together, I did stuff like grocery shopping and clothes shopping with them (I needed some new clothes). We visited the Microsoft gift store to buy a t-shirt or something? I can’t recall everything we did, but that is the sort of stuff we did. It was just time with family. Ben and I both played Natural Selection and Day of Defeat. I let him have my steam account because he wanted to have a copy of half-life two to play on his own PC, and I didn’t play half life two based games, only half life one. His Dad had HL2 and CS:Source, but Ben didn’t have it on his own computer. I think he was really into Day of Defeat: Source at the time.  So that’s what we did.

I played a lot of NS1 (Natural Selection) while I was there. I enjoyed having a low ping to US servers. Note: Natural Selection is basically Quake.

Mostly we just socialised with one another. Just as an aside, Aunty Wendy and the others were kind of surprised that I got engaged so young. But she shouldn’t have been too surprised. We were Christians? It sometimes happens that people/Christians decide to get married young. She wasn’t 100% supportive, but she was actually nice about it. She didn’t seem that bothered. I suppose that it is somewhat unusual for people to get married or engaged that young, so I suppose it is surprising for her. And she gave me some earrings to give to Amanda. They were actually really nice earrings.

(On a prior visit to California we [Dad Matthew and I] had visited Disneyland, Six Flags, Universal Studios and an amusement park called “Great America”. We also travelled by road between San Francisco and LA and back again. We visited Hearst Castle and a few road side attractions and stuff like that. I.e. we did the whole sightseeing tourist thing some time ago, in the past).

My energy levels were bad though. I was exhausted. At first I thought I was just tired from the flight. And then I thought it was jet lag. But then I was still exhausted. I was just being hit with what felt like wave after wave of exhaustion. And no amount of sleep could seem to fix it. Not that I could get enough sleep while I was there, because all four of us boys were staying in the same bedroom. This meant that I couldn’t sleep in.

I just couldn’t get enough sleep. I was tired. No matter how much sleep I got in life from then on, I was always tired. Fatigue became a part of my life from then on. It was the beginning of my “mystery illness”. I also felt groggy and I also started getting the first significant inklings of what you could call brain fog (iirc). _Fatigue came to stay, and never left._

Exercise. I tried to exercise but I ended up feeling pretty bad. It gave me post exertional malaise. I just felt horrible afterwards. Exercise wasn’t working quite right. I also felt a bit constrained and tight through the neck, shoulders, and chest and upper back at the time. But I didn’t think much of it (I didn’t know about the cell towers, satellites and other em spectrum weapons at the time). What sort of exercise did I do? I did some pushups, sit-ups and Swiss ball stuff. My Uncle had some exercise equipment, and I used that. I also did some cardio. They had equipment at the apartment complex.

“Post-exertional malaise (PEM) is a severe worsening of symptoms—such as exhaustion, pain, and cognitive dysfunction—following minor physical or mental effort.”

Post-exertional malaise is horrible. Exercise just didn’t feel right anymore. Before I went overseas, I had been in the habit of exercising a fair bit. And I enjoyed exercise, and was fit, healthy and strong. But that habit went away fairly quickly with the onset of the symptoms and poor health that I started experiencing on this trip. I never got back into the habit of exercise (or at least not _proper_ exercise)

What else?

Oh, the source of these symptoms was my Aunty Wendy. She used electronic weapons on me. Which is very nasty. I didn’t even know that these weapons existed. I thought that it was jet lag, but wasn’t jet lag. It was my Aunty Wendy.

It was my aunty Wendy! It was a family member that I liked!! She was one of my favourites!! And a Christian!

She was using electromagnetic radio wave weapons on my body, mind and nervous system. She was harming me on purpose. In hindsight it is horrifying. It is horrifying to me that someone would harm a member of their own family like that! Just like it would be horrifying to attack and beat and bruise a member of your family! But I did not know at the time that such weapons or social customs existed, let alone that she was using them on me.

****

****

Anyway, I was still feeling bad and a bit unwell at the end of the week that I was there. That week was the first week of my long term “mystery illness”. I did get quite a lot worse in Europe though. It was in France that it first hit me hard. It hit me properly in France. Hard like a ton of bricks. It was kind of just the first taste of it in San Francisco (Palo Alto), intermingled with jet lag and ordinary tiredness. Back to the story. I flew to Europe. Matthew stayed behind in California for a few more weeks. I flew from San Francisco Airport to Frankfurt Airport to Paris Airport. I met my mother at the airport, after waiting for perhaps half an hour. And then it was a car ride for 45 minutes north to a little village in Normandy called Douains, which is just 10 minutes drive away from the nearest town, Pacy-sur-Eure.

That was the end of my time in America, and the start of my time in Europe.

And so I arrived in France.

Sally: Tell me about France. What were you there for? What did you want to do? Was it more to see your mother or more to see the sights? And where else did you go?

I was in France to see my mother, but also wanted to see the sights. The plan was to travel around Europe together to see the sights, but also to spend plenty of time together. The idea was that we might kill two birds with one stone.

It also was important to me that I maintain my relationship with my mother. So I was in Europe. To keep up that connection. Our relationship had been strained for years, because she had (as far as I knew) ruined her marriage with my father by being unfaithful. I thought that I was probably being very kind to her by maintaining a relationship! I was pretty strict about that sort of thing. I had thought of cutting ties with her over her adultery and the way she ruined her marriage with my father.

I had been looking forward to seeing the sights as well. I wanted to see castles, cathedrals, medieval towns and ruins. We were planning to visit Germany, Austria, Italy (Venice) and Spain (Barcelona), as well as spending a little bit of time in France.

Sally: That sounds nice, had you been planning it for a while?

David: Yes, we had been planning it for a while. And even though my mother and I had had our differences in the past, I thought that this trip might be good. Note: previous family holidays with my mother had been less than ideal.

What else is there? Amanda and I had just got engaged. And we were planning to get married. This was because we were Christians, and you are not supposed to have sex outside of marriage. The fact that we were engaged to be married was of course a major topic of conversation. And a source of contention. Mum and I talked about, and Arnold was included in the conversations. As well as other people we spent time with.

And the next thing to mention is that I became quite unwell while I was on this part of the trip. I had started to be unwell while I was in California. But I became thoroughly unwell while I was in Europe.

Sally: So is it on this trip, the Europe leg in particular that you became “good and properly sick”.

David: Yes, it was in Europe that I became good and properly sick. It was horrible!

To make matters worse, my mother did not take it seriously when I got sick. Nor did my father. Amanda did. She took it seriously, or at least pretended to. We talked often, over the internet. And she always acted like she believed me. I was actually really unwell at the time, and I didn’t know why! I was basically being blasted by tons of stuff by these cell towers on behalf of my mother, and she as running me about to wear me out further. And so I was actually pretty unwell! Genuinely unwell! On this trip I was always looking for internet cafes so that I could talk to Amanda. My mother just treated me as though I was being ridiculous. The whole situation was extremely bad for our relationship. It almost entirely destroyed our relationship: I was sick and she just plain didn’t care (unbeknownst to me, she was causing the problems in the first place, using cell-towers and electromagnetic radio frequency attacks on my nervous system). And it wasn’t even the first time I had been sick and she plain didn’t care. I’ll put that incident in the notes (there was a separate incident at about the age of 14 where I was sick and she ignored me. Actually, the crazy thing about that is that she was responsible for that one too, because she attacked my nervous system, mind and body with the these cell tower electromagnetic spectrum radio wave frequency weapons).

Anyway, my mother not only didn’t care that I was unwell (not to mention that she was the one responsible for harming me in the first place [and gaslighting me too]), she wanted to keep a busy travel schedule and itinerary, including early morning starts. And so I became even more worn out. And sometimes staying out later than necessary. We also stayed in hostels and dorms too much! I wanted to stay in basic hotels and other accommodation where at least we didn’t have to share sleeping quarters with other people. To have a place where we didn’t have to share either sleeping quarters OR a bathroom would have been luxury to me. To me, that is the standard to meet for it to be comfortable. If you have your own room AND your own bathroom, which you only have to share with family - no strangers! - then that is luxury and comfort. Oh and, clean sheets and a basically clean environment. (For translation sake, I mean a room + bathroom that is shared between me, Mum and either Matthew or Arnold). When you’re unwell, you want quieter and more comfortable accomodation. Mum was also unwilling to allow me to return home, which I requested again and again. I pleaded to be allowed to be sent home. Or merely to rest. I even suggested that we just cut the itinerary right down, and that we have no morning starts. She was unwilling to budge. I was exhausted and miserable. I spoke to her about it again and again. But it was like talking to a brick wall (In hindsight, she was extraordinarily rude). Or I could have just gone back to her cottage in France and relaxed there. Or maybe I could have spent the next 4-6 weeks or so there, until my flights home. That would have been a comfortable and easy option for all involved. And cheaper. And she and Matthew could had travelled the rest of Europe together, without me.

Where did we go? Germany, Austria, Italy (Venice) and Spain (Barcelona), as well as France. I’ll talk a little bit more about the trip itself soon.

I had a horrible trip. A truly horrible trip. I called it my European death march (I called it that in jest, but it really was awful). I felt awful, and it caused me lasting harm. The machines caused me to have problems with my energy levels and digestion, while also tightening up all my muscles. They spammed me with the thing that drains your energy and makes you feel fatigued. They also tightened things like my neck, shoulders, chest and inner hips. My mother disallowed rest. We were always on the move. It was excruciatingly exhausting. I was a mess.

After I got back to New Zealand, I went straight from the airport to stay at Amanda’s house. I was quite upset at how I had been treated. And I was quite unwell still, when I was there. That is, I was still sick when I was living at Amanda’s mother’s house.

The whole situation in Europe relating to my health destroyed my relationship between my mother and I almost completely (what was left of it, there had been previous issues). And very, very badly damaged my relationship with my father. I was very unwell once I got back to Amanda’s place. Sleep quality was awful. It just plain didn’t restore energy. I would sleep until 1 or 2 in the afternoon and still be exhausted. And my whole body was completely and entirely depleted, I felt like I had been hit by a truck. I was as sick as a dog. The trip had really taken it out of me. My digestion was bad, I couldn’t sleep. I couldn’t make my energy come back.

The trip damaged me, and by the time I got back to New Zealand, I was unwell. It ruined my health. By the way, the last time I ever lifted weights and did strength training was during that trip. And I never was able to regain the habit of proper exercise. I was never healthy again. By the way, one of the reasons that I was never healthy again was that… they kept on doing things?! For years and years they kept on doing things to harm me. And they never stopped. And so I was never fit and healthy again.

Lastly, unbeknownst to me, my mother did the damage to me on purpose. She attacked me again and again with these weapons, harmed me very badly. And kept up the pace of travel, so that she might harm me. It is horrible. I only found out and/or realised that these weapons existed, and that she harmed me on purpose years later. A common term that could be used is gaslighting: doing me harm, pretending harm didn’t exist, and then disallowing me rest, and actively wearing me out. And also digestive troubles (these come into the story a bit more later, and were actually quite serious).

Why did she hurt me? The answer is that I don’t know. But I do know that she was hurting and damaging me on purpose, and that overall she did it because she wanted to. And that she ignored or blanked me when I complained about being extremely unwell and asked to be allowed to be sent home.

Anyway, I ended up pretty unwell by the time I was back in New Zealand.

****

****

Sally: Were you aware of the existence of the cell towers and satellites, and the weapons and powers associated with them, at the time? Or the fact that people could use them to hurt you?

David: No, I was not. I was totally ignorant of the existence of this technology. I did not become fully aware of the cell tower and satellite technology until 2024. In late 2023 I started to find out about a variety of techniques and technologies, but I still at the time thought that they were built into the houses I was staying. It was only in 2024 that I knew about them properly. Back in 2006/2007 I didn’t know about this technology.

Sally: So that must mean that you had no idea why you suddenly started experiencing symptoms?

David: Yes, that is correct, I didn’t know why I had started experiencing symptoms.

[Ps: a note for the reader, I was also unaware of the existence of “double speak”, sex games, sex based social engineering and social control, Wiccan games or all of that stuff. Especially double speak. I could manage wordplay, irony, sarcasm, humour of all kinds. But I didn’t know about double speak, sex games or bullying culture in general. I was hyper focused on Christian culture and values. _Cruelty wasn’t something that made sense to me. Dishonesty or a lack of integrity was also a somewhat foreign idea to me._]

Just to reiterate, I was sick and so I wanted to go home to New Zealand, or to go home to my mother's place in Douains France (to relax and do nothing much), or at least stay put in the same spot for a few days and stay in a hotel where we don't have to share a room with general hostel guests (just family) and don't have early starts or late starts. And if possible to have our own bathroom (honestly, a luxury!). And to eat normal food, and to not have to drive around all of the time. Or walk every where all of the time. One of those options. Or perhaps to stay at Taras' house (but I don't think that that was a proper option at all - I only had one or two nights there, but it was good and relaxing - no getting fried by the em spectrum weapons, it was noteworthy to me that I felt okay for a day or two there).

****

****

The Story of My Trip:

Now for some more information about the trip itself, from start to finish. Let us just briefly recount the events of the trip. Or at least some of them.

Sally: Is this necessary? To talk about the whole trip.

David: Yes, it was on this trip that I lost my health. And it never came back. And I never regained my health. It is one of the most important periods of my life. It also caused tremendous damage to my relationship with my father and mother. It was a quite unpleasant time in my life. It was one of the most unpleasant periods of time in my life up until that point.

I will admit that we have basically covered most of the the important bits already.

***

So where do I start?

Sally: I don’t know, where do you want to start?

My mother was renting an old stone cottage in Douains, this is a little bit north of Paris. My bedroom was in the lounge, and I was sleeping on the futon couch. It was a foldout couch. It wasn’t very quiet or very comfortable and I couldn’t sleep very well. It was winter at the time, and it was cold outside. The house itself was warm though. When I arrived there, I was exhausted. I had already been feeling thoroughly exhausted when I was in the USA and then I was feeling even more exhausted in France. I figured that I was tired from the flight, and had been tired from when I was in the USA as well. And then it would pass.

I set myself the task of getting enough rest and sleep. I was exhausted, and I had a lot of sleep to catch up on. Perhaps “it was jet lag” I said. But I couldn’t quite seem to catch up. I remained tired.

So anyway, we looked around a bit, and visited places like the local town Pacy-sur-Eure. It was nice looking around, but I was exhausted. I felt a kind of strong fatigue or exhaustion that kind of settled its way into my body and mind. I didn’t know it at the time, but my mother was doing it to me. It hit me hard. [for the audience at home I have to repeat that that, “It hit me hard”]. It was in this period of time that it hit me hard. Symptoms like fatigue and bad digestion hit properly. As well as weird brain fog type of stuff. Also, they had tightened up some parts of my body. By remote control. Which is a really weird and difficult thing to explain. The explanation is that stuff like my neck, upper back, shoulders, chest and iliopsoas were tightened up. And my body was clamped down. But I didn’t fully cotton on to what was happening. Maybe it is like this. I had tight shoulders, and also my chest, neck and maybe back were tight already. I was a former boxer and a fanatic when it came to exercises like planks, sit ups, bicep curls, pushups, pull ups and jump rope. I also enjoyed bench press and going to the gym. I loved ab exercises, the captains chair, twisting sit ups, side planks, leg push downs and bicycles (ab exercise). And my iliopsoas and/or core were already “holding a fair bit of strength”. And especially my shoulders were tight. The “traps” were solid. This means that the remote control tightening… it may have had an unorthodox impact or result?? I may have had more capacity to resist it, but less ability to notice it? I’m not sure.

Anyway, back to the social side of things.

My mother wasn’t happy with me. A fair bit of it had to do with getting engaged. Also, she was out to get me, just in general. Not that I knew it at the time. We can talk about that elsewhere (no joke! Both of my parents were out to get me, and had been for a long, long time - not that I knew it at the time). We had had a brief conversation about my getting engaged, and religion. Her point was that I could possibly just live with Amanda, without getting married. My mother at the time was pretending to be a Christian. She and I were supposed to share similar values such as love, peaceableness, patience, compassion, truthfulness, integrity, no adultery, no living with a partner before or outside of marriage. She was currently living with Arnold, and was engaged to get married to him at some point. Which was against the rules. Long story short, Mum wasn’t happy about me getting married. But she didn’t actually engage in proper conversations about it. It would have been so easy to deal with the situation. She could have just told me that she didn’t believe in Christianity and that all of religion was fake or untrue.

Sally: Tell me more about the symptoms. What were they like?

David: At this point, they involved fatigue (they involved a lot of fatigue/tiredness/exhaustion, and seem to have involved muscle tightening. I had the symptom of fatigue. And plenty of it. I was dog tired. Totally exhausted. And so I was exhausted, my muscles were contracted, and I had a tight neck and back. I didn’t realise at the time that they were doing the thing where they tighten up my muscles. Like my chest, neck, shoulders and back were tightened up. The tightening up made me feel horrible and bad, but for some reason I didn’t cotton on to what “it” was. I didn’t realise it was done by remote control. I just felt a kind of general “badness”. This actually happened a long time ago. So I don’t quite know how to talk about it properly, nor do I remember properly. I didn’t feel it as tremendous tightness. Just as wrongness.

More symptoms here:

I experienced a great deal of fatigue, and exhaustion.

I had dry mouth.

I had brain fog.

I had constipation (to be specific, Bristol stool chart level one).

I couldn’t rest.

My body was all tightened up.

I was strong, so I coped with the tightening.

I had the body “modified” by a bit of boxing (and other exercise), which means that I coped with the tightening. I think that this affected it.

The two above points perhaps meant that I had less awareness of what was being tightened up, or how it worked.

I was exhausted. I was very, very tired.

I experienced post exertional malaise.

I was tired, but could not rest. I felt horrible.

So I had symptoms. You can actually see some of these visually in pictures taken of me at the time. These pictures are in the pictures page. I was pale and sick. I was as sick as a dog. I was exhausted and felt horrible. You can see these in photos taken of me at the time. And I had very bad digestion (constipation, Bristol stool chart 1, to be specific). I also had Post-exertional malaise (PEM). Post-exertional malaise is a severe worsening of symptoms—such as exhaustion, pain, and cognitive dysfunction—following minor physical or mental effort.

Back to the story.

I complained to my mother that I was unwell, but she didn’t seem to take it that seriously. She complained about me being engaged, but failed to communicate well. I was unwell. And then she set to planning out a trip around Europe. She was booking various places to stay and to visit. She rebooked things. She was booking them over the phone. We were to travel around and see parts of France, Germany, Austria, Italy (especially Venice), Spain (especially Barcelona).

And then we set off on our journey.

At first it was just Arnold, Mum and I. The problem was that Matthew and Arnold didn’t get along all that well. So we used to try to limit their time spent around and with one another. Matthew was enjoying about three weeks at Aunty Wendy before joining us. On the leg following that, we were planning to ditch Arnold, and keep Matthew. So we set about travelling. He also couldn’t take an infinite amount of time off of work. Or didn’t want to!

****

We travelled by road across France. In Arnold’s company car. We stopped at various places to look at things. We travelled by backroads, to avoid paying tolls. We stayed at cheap places. It was weird though. We were travelling in the off season (winter). And it’s not supposed to be as busy in the off season. But still my mother took us to weird or less comfortable places to stay, like freezing cold, half-abandoned school dorms. There was this one place we visited, and it was a spooky high school dormitory in France (humour me). It was empty, because it was the holidays, but we just slept in 3 bunks somewhere in this big building, and then had the saddest breakfast in the saddest cafeteria I have ever seen. It was a plastic foil covered packet full of cocoa pops and a tiny thing of milk. It must have been a boarding school for wretched people who had done something wrong. Or needed to be punished for something (I jest). It was legitimately good enough to be the set for a horror movie. Anyway, we ended up staying at a bunch of really quiet places across France. And the places we stayed in Germany were a little quiet too. I’m not sure that it should have been that quiet wherever we went, but it was. I think that my mother was trying to pick crummy places, and stymie some of my attempts to meet new people, or that she was trying to curate who I met? I dunno. I was overseas, cold, miserable, I had no money and didn’t know foreign languages, so I stuck close to Mum and Arnold. Arnold speaks German (and Dutch), Mum speaks French. We stayed in another school in Verona/Girona (I don’t actually know where by the way). And that place was just plain rundown and uncomfortable. Doors in the bathroom didn’t close, the place was falling apart. I think that it was student accomodation, but was nastier than anything I had seen in NZ. Spain I think it was. It was a dump. 

Arnold crashed his car at one point (or his company car I should say). He did this partway through the trip. He just ploughed through a barrier. I remember that day. Before it happened, was just exhausted chilling in the back seat of the car.

What is the story for that… umm. We had just driven from France to Germany. There was dust on the window and then rain sprinkled on it. I think that there was dust from the road. Perhaps it was dry that day. And the vision was obscured. But there wasn’t enough rain to wash it, just to make it grubby. And then he used the windshield wipers to clean it off. But that just smudged it. Which is bad. And vision is impaired. And then he wanted to pull off of the road. Maybe there wasn’t rain, just the thing that squirts water on to the windscreen to let it be cleaned. And then he did: he found a spot to pull off of the road. He thought it was a rest area, but it wasn’t. It was like a utility area for service vehicles. And it was protected and/or closed with an arm as a gate. There was a barrier across it. He couldn’t see it. And he just ploughed straight through it. Which damaged the whole of the car. It scraped over the top of the car and down the back of it. And so that was dramatic. I was so tired at the time that I just said meh, and got some rest. And so there was a car crash haha! So much for life being peaceful. We had to swap out the car for a new rental. Which was a hassle, but otherwise okay. The police back in Germany laughed at Arnold.

We saw some nice cathedrals and a few castles in France. There were some nice ruins out beside my mother’s place. The ruins had formerly been a castle. Also, elsewhere there was a castle that had been rebuilt, or reconstructed somewhere out there in France too. It was just a reconstruction, but it was in a good location. I love castles, I had always wanted to wanted to go to see castles.

We visited a reconstructed castle, and it was “out of season”. We had to climb around the fence to try to get in. But it was closed. It wasn’t a very good castle. But it was something. It seems that we couldn’t find a castle to visit. Which seems strange to me. Oh wait, no.. we stayed in a castle. It actually wasn’t that nice!! Castles aren’t that comfy. I remember we made it to Germany. We visited Nuremberg, and went to the night markets. We had mulled wine and bought souvenirs. I bought a teddy bear for Amanda. We looked at little medieval towns. Like Nurembergburg. We went to places like Stuttgard. We looked at little castles. It was kind of nice. There was this one place up in a hill. That had a medieval walled town. I loved, adored, that town. It was fantastic. But I was so, so tired!!! 

Christmas Day was in Germany. We stayed in a gasthoff, and went to an Asian restaurant for dinner. I think that it was a Malaysian restaurant. It was okay, but lonely. I missed Amanda. The gasthoff was nice. It had weird window coverings. Like a storm roller made of aluminium. Those covered the windows. I’m sorry that this part of the story has become a bit of a disjointed ramble. But I am just getting on with it.

I stayed at Munich for a night at Taras’ family’s house. While in Munich I asked my mother if I could go home, she said no. I asked her if I could stay at Taras home for a few more days. She said no. I went online to call my dad on Skype to see if I could go home early. He said no. I asked when I was at Munich to be allowed to go home. Dad ignored me. Blanked me. He plain didn’t care. We went to the hofbrauhaus house. I actually had an okay night sleep while staying at taras’ parent’s home. I remembered sleeping well there. And I wanted to stay longer. I even thought of just bailing on my mother and Arnold there. But I didn’t know how to deal with travel. And I didn’t have enough money to change tickets, if I needed to. I was basically stranded. I was really quite unwell, but I wasn’t able to bail on my mother. If I had had spare money, I’d have walked out of my mother’s life at that point. Or at least flown home. But I couldn’t leave. I actually didn’t learn my lesson after that. I should have. The lesson is don’t spend more than 30 minutes with your mother at a time. Maybe an hour. And more than two hours a month. My mother is a disease. Terrible human bring. There are multiple incidents (the 14, the 18, the incident at about 23, all of the lies and bad advice when I went to her for help with my health, she could have told me,  and mild/moderate drama and harm each time I visited her in Christchurch. In hindsight she used machines on me. That was two times). She’s just good for nothing. Sorry about that, there are a lot of things to do with my mother that could be said, but they don’t all get communicated in a quick post like this one.

While we were there, we went to Munich Cathedral, bought a sausage at a stall in the square, Taras harassed a couple of Scientologists. We visited a beer hall. He had a beer, I had a coke. And we visited the Munich science and technology museum. And we went on the subway, which I had not been many of those in my life.

We went back to the haufbrqhuas the next night, and it was nice. We had dinner, and Tara’s dad played the cello for a bit.

We went to Salzburg (Mozart hometown). We also went to Barcelona it was nice.  Barcelona was nice.

Went skiing in Austria. Stayed in a hostel. I was very, very tired afterwards. Tired beforehand too. It was supposed to be two days of skiing. But I did only one day skiing. I kept on trying to sleep in the car before and after than part of the trip, but sleep was always elusive. I was so tired all the time back then, but I didn’t understand why!

Blah blah blah.

I kept on wanting to get rest. But we didn’t stay put in one place. It was always, get up at 6 am to go to a new place, drive all day. Go out to dinner, and get into bed a bit too late. I didn’t get enough rest.

We reconnected with Matthew, and we went on to Spain and Italy. We saw Venice and Barcelona. We went to places like St Mark’s Square, and stayed 4 days in Venice itself. Funny story, mum’s card declined because of all of the travel. And we couldn’t buy anything. We had to live off of pasta boiled in our room. Or use the credit card function at restaurants. We discovered that that worked. Haha. It was a bit of a debacle. I was tired, so it was mostly miserable. And I couldn’t ever get enough sleep. In Barcelona, we went to a hostel and stayed there. We visited a garden designed by Gaudi, and the Sagrada familia. But I was too tired to climb it!! Which is sad. Because 5 weeks prior, in New Zealand I would have been happy to climb it!! I liked the foreign quarter or the gothic  quarter. I think that that is what it is called. That was nice. As it so happens, the last time I exercised properly (weights and stuff) was in 2007 in Barcelona. In the hostel gym. We met random people in Venice, which was nice. I don’t understand the “double speak” at all. But it is often nice seeing new people. In Venice I tried to take it easy, because we had a few days in the same place. And so I just borrowed someone’s video iPod (they were still cool back then) and watched a movie.

We met up with with Matthew. I think that it happened in Italy? Maybe? I can’t recall. It happened after we had dropped Arnold and gone on without him. But I think we mentioned that already.

So they were blasting me with stuff. But not letting me sleep! It sucked!! I didn’t know that I was being blasted.

I had a dry mouth the whole time. I know that it doesn’t seem like a big symptom, but it was constant. My mouth felt dry, and I was always looking for water to drink. And one of the funny things is that the water in Europe was so often bubbly water. I would try to find still water, and it would all be bubbly! Which I hated back then, but like now.

I also went to Treviso, and Girona. We went to a restaurant on the bridge in Treviso. I think it was the Ponte Dante. We had pizza with peppers and fizzy water. I couldn’t manage to get what I wanted lol. I wanted to get pizza with pepperoni, and ended up with peppers. And I just wanted tap water, still, and they gave me fizzy. Which is crazy haha. I was thirsty the whole time. Like, all the time. Anyway, I loved the pizza from the cheap places, where they heat it by the slice, and it’s a giant triangle of foldable, rollable grease. I liked Margherita pizza. But the actual restaurant wasn’t so great. Gelato: first time having gelato was in Venice, I think? Other stuff was good. Nice pasta, nice lasagne. I think I had the worst sandwich in have ever had from a train station in Traviso. I explored a fair bit of Venice on foot, but we didn’t go on a gondola. I was shattered!! Matthew and Mum went to Murano and Burano, small islands beside Venice. I just stayed home and listened to music and watched Zoolander on someone else’s iPod video.

Girona we stayed in a school or university dorm or accomodation or something. It was lame. But holidays with my mother are weird. Weird. Anyways that is enough.

We went to Salzburg. Bought some Mozart branded chocolate. And looked at horses and carriages. It was cold. It snowed. There were horses and carriages riding about. It’s a nice place. But I still felt unwell. We looked into a museum. It was a museum of music. I pleaded with my mother to let me leave and go home early to New Zealand. But I was very unwell. Arnold actually suggested to my mother that she send me home. My mother wasn’t willing to. It was a significant argument. This actually wasn’t the first time I had had a bad holiday or trip with my mother and asked to go home early. That trip was back at the age of about 16/17, I think. Matthew and I were both wanting to go home early. Travel with my mother usually wasn’t fun at the best of times. And there was another trip where she always wanted to do bushwalks and stuff, but I actually had a deep cut on my leg, that ought to have had stitches. But she wanted to keep on walking around places etc. simply walking around reopened the wound. I had injured myself by falling out of a tree while racing Arnold. A branch broke and I fell, getting some cuts on my back, thigh and knee. As well as other minor grazes. We went to the hospital, but they were slack. So anyway, on that holiday, I wanted to stop walking around to shops, and campgrounds and places like that, and bush walks. And just chill. But none of that mattered. My knee kept reopening. I had to walk with a stiff leg just to avoid it reopening. Anyways, she has a history holidays being crappy. And also of not caring for me properly when sick or injured. See also: the sickness I had after Japan.

We visited people in Europe just to socialise. For example, we visited a family who liked renovating houses for fun and for money. Their modus operandi was to buy a house, tidy it up and renovate it. And then sell it off. Their current place was three stories high and somewhere in the outskirts of Paris. They were nice enough. I say that because we passed the time by meeting people and socialising.

****

****

It was a horrible 7 weeks.

I had told my mother again and again and again. That I just wanted to go home!! But it was like talking to a brick wall! I was sick and I was just getting stonewalled. And then I got sicker and sicker. Note: I had tons of symptoms, and I felt horrible. It was horrible.

***

Last day in Europe, or second to last, I didn’t go into Paris. It was the last day, and I wanted to travel into Paris, by public transport. To look at stuff like the Lourve. And to look around Paris. Matthew wanted to go too. But I was soooooo tired. I think that they were hitting me with something. I was so dog tired that I couldn’t go anywhere.

It was something like a walk, a bus and a train. To get into Paris. My mother suggested that I go, and take Matthew. But I was extra, super, extraordinarily tired that day. It sucked. And so I never saw Paris properly, or went to the Louvre.

Anyway. On the very last day, we all went to the house of a couple (and their daughter) who lived close to Paris Airport. This was to cut down on transportation to the airport and plane. What did we eat? Well there was the cheese fondu. And the tiny cans of coke. I loved their tiny cans of coke in France.

When we met them. The little girl in the family wanted me to kiss her cheek. Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh. Physical contact. Ahhhhhhhhhh. Panic. Ahhhhhhh. I think I balked at first: no not balked. Just hesitated. And then…. And then I did the French custom of kissing on both cheeks. Aghhhhhhhhh. Arggghhh. But oh well. 

We stayed there over night. And slept. I was feeling pretty unwell. It was a house belonging to a friend of my mother and Arnold’s. Saves us time travelling into the airport. I only slept for a few hours, so it seems like a waste to me.

And then we slept for a few hours there, and took a flight from Paris Airport in the early hours of the morning. We flew in the wee hours of the morning. Second flight from Frankfurt, next flight from LA iirc, and the next from Auckland to Wellington. I wasn’t feeling well. It was about 60-70 hours in transit. Or something. I can’t remember. Without sleep. I was very tired afterwards.

Then when we got to the airport, Amanda, my fiancé met me there. And there were too few seats for us to travel back to Kapiti together. And so I went with Amanda. And stayed at her house. I didn’t go back to live at home. Although, Amanda and I still visited there. And we still were doing to the CCC. Dad quickly rented out my bedroom to Max Macfarlane, which meant that I don’t have a room to move back to.

And…. Then off to university not long after. Amanda and her mother took some time to go off to Tonga for a trip. I house sat and took care of their dog (I never really formed a strong connection with the dog, but I didn’t understand dogs well yet. I trained her a bit with voice commands, and played catch, and fed her, but I didn’t bathe her properly, if at all. And I didn’t really get to know her? Actually, I tell a lie. I actually did okay, and Maggie actually came to prefer me to Amanda. I just wasn’t a very good dog person, even though I tried a bit at first. Later on I wasn’t well enough to walk her and stuff, and I kind of lost control of the situation). I had a burst of maybe ten or so days when my health wasn’t as bad, when Amanda and her Mum were away, but I was still unwell. During those week or two without Amanda and her Mum, I got books from the library about things like posture, breathing and health. Including yoga, Tibetan yoga, posture makes perfect, and relaxation. But nothing helped. I also read about “chronic fatigue syndrome”. I knew that something was wrong with my health, but I didn’t know what was wrong, or what to do about it.

And, then I went off to university! I lived at 5 Weka Road, at Amanda’s mother’s house. And commuted into university. It was exhausting and miserable. After a few weeks (maybe three weeks in), I moved into Wellington to live at my dad’s dad’s place. Wellington to Kapiti is about 45-55 minutes drive. I still had a relationship with my father at this point. He offered me some work in my shop, which took. I didn’t love my dad’s shop. But money is money! And I got offered some work at Alpha computers next door, but that didn’t happen. My dad set it up. It wasn’t suitable for me, I didn’t have all of the skills (although I would have had the job anyway haha). It conflicted with my schedule, and I had no energy. My energy levels were always shot completely. And it was too far from where I lived. It was html and SEO stuff, pretty pedestrian.

And I might just leave it at that for now.

****

****

****

****

Miscellany and notes:

We didn’t ever get to sleep in. Every time we stayed somewhere, we had to get up early to go places. So I didn’t get sleep.

I was exhausted!! I felt wave after wave of exhaustion. And I don’t know it at the time. 

But my mother was the cause.

It was symptoms being caused electronically, reinforced by being pushed to keep travelling. And further compounded by not knowing what was wrong.

**

Dramatised: There is no way to understand this!!!!! My mother was blasting me with zap cannons. Ahhhhhhhh. Fatigue, constipation, brain fog, bad sleep, horrible! Horrible! But I didn’t know that these weapons existed!!! Horrible! And I felt unwell. I could feel very well that something was wrong but I didn’t know what it was!!! I had no knowledge of these weapons at all!!!

****

****

Japan trip and getting sick afterwards, at age 14

Sally: Okay, please tell me about your trip to Japan and how you got sick afterwards. You were about 13 or 14 at the time, were you?

David Solt: Yes, I was about 13 or 14 at the time. My father and I went on a visit to Japan together. We went for ten days. It was nice. But I was quite tired during the trip. And the day before the trip was finished, I became a little unwell. I had thought at the time that it was something I ate. We then took a flight back from Japan. We stopped off in Sydney half way home. I was very tired in Sydney. It was a long layover. But there was nowhere to sleep. For some strange reason, this is what we did. We rented a car, tried to sleep in the car for about 1-2 hours. And after that, we went to a Sydney theme park (aka amusement park) to go on the rides, including the roller coasters (there was a wooden roller coaster there that my father recommended, or otherwise had reminisced about from when he lived in Sydney, and I was obsessed with roller coasters). The roller coaster we wanted was under repair (out of order). But we went on a few other rides, including a weird loop-the-loop roller coaster, with a reverse track and two corkscrews. Like, you go through it forwards, and then momentum takes you up the hill, and then you get dropped through it to go backwards. 4 inversions, each of which you go through both forwards and backwards. It was awesome. But anyway. Then we went back to the airport to fly home. I got off of the plane to go spend the night in Wellington at Papa and Eva’s house (my paternal grandfather’s house). I got sicker. And when I was in bed, trying to sleep, I had auditory hallucinations. I was hearing things. I was feeling really unwell! And then I flew from Wellington Airport to Napier Airport, and then hopped off the plane. By then I was feeling very unwell. Hanae met me at the airport. She said that I was looking almost grey. I didn’t even want to drink water. I remember drinking water out of one of those little cups with foil over top of it and feeling horrible. I felt flat and miserable. I got back to our house in Taradale, Napier. And I had a few days off in bed. I felt awful, but my mother didn’t do anything to be nice.  She didn’t lift a finger. Hanae was the only one who even pretended to care. She tended to me. I was pale and ashen faced, exhausted, feverish and couldn’t sleep. Also I had auditory hallucinations. And I had no appetite, and I had stomach issues. And severe constipation (hard dry stool). The hallucinations were all about the Iraq war and sounded like the TV being on in the next room. The hallucinations at my grandfather’s house were similar.

Looking back, I suspect the illness was induced by cell towers, as was the hallucinations. I was actually pretty sick! And also, my mother neglected to care for me. I assume that she was behind the choice to use cell towers to make me unwell, like the cell towers harming me, as well. I am telling you this just to let you know that there is a pattern here of deliberate harm and neglect. As well as conspiracy between my parents to harm me.

Sally: Okay, that doesn’t sound very nice! Your mother sounds like a horrible, nasty woman. What is the next note?

David: Well, there was another trip I went on where I fell out of a tree, got hurt, probably needed stitches. Had a bunch of cuts that needed some time to heal. And then I didn’t end up getting stitches. And one of the cuts was on my knee, but it would open every time that I walked. Bending it reopened the wound. Keeping my leg straight was fine, but bending it wasn’t. But my mother wanted to keep travelling on her holiday. I could walk without reopening the wound if only I kept my leg straight. And so I just needed maybe 4-5 days chilling out quietly at home. To let it close up normally. I could walk slowly, without too much trouble. Not that slowly! And so we kept travelling, and staying at campgrounds and doing bush walks. I just wanted to chill. She is mean. That one isn’t as bad, but it is part of a wider pattern of behaviour.

Other holiday.

This one is literally just a whine:

I went down south with Mum, Arnold and Matthew. And it sucked so badly that I wanted to go home. And I even joked with Matthew about hitchhiking home just to escape the boringness of it all. Mum just isn’t fun. Holidays with her aren’t fun either. The South Island is really nice, and to ruin that takes a bit of doing. Holidays with her are all about just going from place to place and setting up and tearing down tents. And she likes to travel on the cheap, and you never stay in one place long enough to really have fun. And the places to stay aren’t comfortable. And you don’t meet people who are fun. They are all boring. Just a whine to be honest! But travel with my mother is annoying at the best of times. And staying with her isn’t fun either.

Sally: Wait, that is a different topic. Can we talk about that now? Staying with her.

David: Yes, staying with her at her place. That used not to be fun either. That is a jump way into the future though. She used to fatigue me, tighten my muscles, and give me constipation. She did it when I visited her flat/apartment in Christchurch and also her home (later on) in Christchurch. It’s awful. But it just isn’t fun. I actually get pretty sick! Like really! Tummy problems! It isn’t funny, and I don’t know why she is so horrible.

Anyway, let us switch to another topic.

Matthew and the pie!

Matthew actually served me a pie. A gone off expired pie. To try to poison me. I ate a few bites and tossed it. I felt a little off, but was fine. He actually gave it to me by telling me that Max had eaten one (max hadn’t), and I ate a few bites. He later told me that Max had become really unwell because of the pie, and was really sick. Pale and unwell and weak for days. Max was not sick at all. Matthew was using hints and dishonesty to communicate. It was symbolic. Max was representative of me in his stories. But anyway, he fed me long gone off food.

Sally: Haha, your family is awful.

David: Yes. My family is full of bad people.

Sally: what next?

David: I have had terrible digestion.

They gave me very bad digestion. I have had terrible digestion. Hard, dry, slightly grey pellets. They caused me a lot of problems. And I was denied appropriate healthcare again and again. I am not sure how much to go into it.

General story

My grand father (Michael Foster) once told my father (Paul Solt) not to marry my mother (Tedge Solt). Saying that she was selfish, self centred and difficult. 

My father married her anyway.

****

****

My mother's name when she was born was "Bridget Elizabeth Foster". But when she was a child, she decided that she wanted to be called "Tedge", because it was “all mixed up and backwards, just like her”.

The name Tedge is what you get when you turn Bridget backwards (tegdirb), and modify it a little bit. Or at least that is how she did it. It was from a game with her friends.

And since then, no one can call her Bridget. IMO, Bridget is a much nicer name. She changed her name legally to Tedge Emily Memelink as an adult (Memelink is Arnold’s surname - he is Dutch). And I don't know why she hated the name Elizabeth either.

She is a bit odd.

****

****

Mazengarb road surgery:

I visited a doctor at age 17 while still in school. Due to “waves of fatigue”. He fobbed me off. Telling me that I just needed to go for a bike ride. And that I should “check my balls”. The “waves of fatigue” were due to cell towers and satellites

****

****

Note: I had a disproportionately strong core when I was a teenager. (And this includes my abs, inner hip muscles and my neck). I also had somewhat tight shoulders.

It may be the case that this somehow had an effect on how the remote control tightening of my muscles affected my body. Perhaps I had more than the usual amount of ability to resist it, but less of an ability to detect it. I just didn't know what was making my body feel bad. I just knew I felt bad. They did a lot of long term tightening of my muscles.

****

****

Just a few quick notes of how I hope to write the rest of the story (these are just notes, not a commitment or a statement of absolute truth)

Part one: Background

Part Two: Europe trip

Part Three: First year in university: from arriving back in NZ, Living in Newtown, to living in Wellington (Kelburn then Karori), until I am in Newtown. Getting married. Still very unwell.

Part Four: Second year, living jn Newtown, drama, for example my car getting lit on fire, moving back to Paraparaumu, preparing for my third year at university. Still very unwell!

Part Five: Third year in university, feeling sick and dropping out, and then that whole year re doctors (Amanda Clarke and specialists iirc). Fourth year: start university and have to drop out six weeks in, trying to do web design, more doctors. And also physio and stuff.

Part 6: Very, very bad digestion: some serious stuff here; Dad visiting to ask about health. Like a random visit to signal that he was behind it.

Part 7: moving house, suddenly

Part 8: some sort of issue with Mum visiting. And then worsening symptoms. And then antidepressants. Then cell tower symptoms. Then some sort of breakdown, all combined. A significant period before things stabilised. Then long term back issues. Back issues? Torso issues? Not sure what the word is.

Three years mega invalid. Can’t even go on dates easily, can’t go to dinner. That’s it!

Skip a bit (too disturbing and traumatic to even examine the period 2017 to 2022 again.

And then do my life story: after I discovered that I was being watched by intelligence services, intelligence agencies, and their servants (who I can to call the fae).

My focus is on the loss of my health, and all of the doctor’s visits and stuff that I did. And on all of the times I asked my mother and father for guidance and advice. Amongst other people I went to for advice.

I also want to do a page on my life story and friendships/relationships and how it relates to my life story.

****

****

Bottom line: there is a whole lot more to talk about! And we are just getting started.