Health

First attempt… I hope this page is okay

Health

I got really sick all of a sudden at about the age of 18, around 12-17th December 2006. And never recovered.
This is perhaps the most important part of my life story.

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I came down with what seemed to be a mystery illness. I didn't know what it was. But from then on, I was unwell.

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^I deliberately made that statement polite, understated and respectable. Because sometimes it is better to be understated.

^I am still trying to figure out how to communicate certain issues with other people about how bad my health has been. But it is difficult to explain it to others.

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It has been difficult to fully explain the situation.

If I over explain things, I come across badly.

If I am understated in how I explain things, I downplay it too much.

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Symptoms

I will explain symptoms now...

I will focus on symptoms I had early on...

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From my point of view:
They included...

fatigue and extreme exhaustion

brain fog

post exertional malaise (can't exercise)

a "sense of wrongness" within my torso

my sleep quality vanished completely

extremely bad digestion

chills

night sweats, bad ones 

sweats, "hot flashes", profuse sweating during the day for no reason

inability to control my body temperature

dry mouth, persistent thirst (to the point that I though I had diabetes?) I repeat, I was always thirsty!

cognitive issues, lack of focus and forgetfulness

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later on, within a couple of years of the Europe trip (by 2008-2009):

low blood oxygenation resulting in weakness, dizziness and faintness, and sometimes blue lips

an inability to sit normally

back pain as well

issues with breathing, relating to back pain

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later on again, by around 2013-2014

I. had an inability to sit normally when going to a cafe, or a restaurant

this was linked to back problems, and by extension, breathing issues

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The Suddenness of it

Umm. It was a sudden switch. In 7th form and late 2006 I was healthy, and then in December 2006, I wasn't.

I had a mystery illness from then on.

This was one of the most important defining issues of my life.

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My health issues defined my life from then on.

My life was defined by my health issues from then on.

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How did define my health problems?

How did I define, describe or explain my health problems?

To me, they were my “mystery illness”. The “aetiology” was unknown.

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At certain points I described it as my mystery illness.

At certain points, some people tried to make. I think that it was depression. Or suggested (directly or indirectly) that it was all in my head.

At one point I thought that I had had glandular fever in 7th form, and that I had recovered from it, but that I’d had a flare up in Europe, and that I’d had negative long term effects.

At another point, I thought that I had caught a bug in form 7 and that Europe had made it worse.

At another point (much later), I thought the root issue was back problems. I felt that this was pretty big part of it. But nothing I did seemed to help very much?

At one point I thought that it might be neurological.

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At one point, I needed to get the sickness benefit, and so I needed a label. It got labelled CFS. Amanda pushed this label HARD. So far as getting welfare, it was a useful label. But it wasn’t very good in terms of explaining why I was sick. It had very little explanation value when it comes to helping me to understand what was wrong with me.

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What was actually wrong with me? Well. Tons of electronic harm was done to my body by these satellite systems. AND there was tons of deliberate sleep deprivation and noise pollution other than that.
That is why I was sick.
And I didn’t know why.

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Europe trip history:

The Europe trip was awful. My time in USA was awful too. I was sick and I didn’t know why. __I cannot over emphasis how bad it was. It was a terrible situation regarding my health. It was cataclysmic for me. I can’t explain it.__ I just got so, so sick. And I had been so fit before that? Or at least pretty fit, and fairly strong?

I was miserable.

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Mum and Dad acted like I wasn’t sick and didn’t need help. It was horrible. I used to rely on them so much. They acted like it was just in my head.

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I was engaged to Amanda by then. Which complicated matters with my parents.

But she was the only one who believed me when I said that I was unwell. And she was there for me. I was really, really unwell.

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Jesse and David Orchard

Jesse and his brother David Orchard both had Chronic fatigue syndrome and both had to have extended time off of work. Jesse had “post viral fatigue syndrome”. David Orchard became well after a “miraculous healing meeting”. Jesse had something similar happen to him.
I think that they were both dishonest about this.

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Conclusion:

And so I was really sick.
It sucked.

And my whole life was all about, or mostly focussed on health issues from 18 onwards.

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Doctors were not helpful. And that is a massive understatement. 

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Life has been about…

Since 18, I have been unwell. And my whole life has mostly been around the idea that my health is bad, and I want to get my health back.

So to say I haven't done the things I "wanted" in life, or I don't want anything, is nonsense. I have been unwell, and wanted to get my health back.